Holly.

"Tis the season."

Where on earth did 2010 just go?

It's December..

..seriously?

Christmas is my favourite day of the whole year!


"ooohh merry christmas!"

side note: spending the first moments of Christmas with great friends makes me happy!

"close your eyes, i'm on the table."
found out i'm quite the playa in crash bandagoot team racing.

8:00am start to the day.

had strawberries for breakfast.

Dad picked me up & we headed up to Masterton to my Auntys house.
i can already smell the warm mince pudding & pine that sooths the surrounding scents.

seriously, i was in my happy place.

walked around for about half an hour just recording around the house by myself so i can remember how beautiful this place was.

the video did not do it justice.

had the most beautiful slash beast meal of my life.

i love my Aunty's cooking.

but the classic orange chicken that is usually is on the table drives me insane.

i cannot stand fruit infused meat.

they have this cat that kept giving me cuddles.

it made me feel so special.

The same cat that had sneaked into the
guinea pig pen, & left only little hands &
feet all throughout the house. good meal?
maybe not.

It sparked a memory of when i used to
visit my grandma at her home,
I used to pretend to be a cat & walk around meowing.

She left milk & nuitergrain in two separate
saucers on the ground while i spent the
whole day on all fours.

then the christmas crackers got cranked where you get those coloured hats.
there is currently an orange one in my car.
"the party hat."

speaking of party.

new years.

Hmmm.

The end of the year only means a beginning of a new.

- I wonder what is going to be in store?
next level.

I am looking forward to see what happens!
God is quite good at surprises.

Go.

odmorning.

ing away.
(excited.)

ing to go to the park with the girls is something i won't be doing for a while.
(hello 4 week holiday.)

osebumps used to give me nightmares.
(the classic horror section my dad used to take me to in the video store whenever we hung out & watched a movie.)

o goo goo goo goo"-fist pumping to supre music.
(i miss working with my homegirl. it's her last shift today. also enjoy that we are hanging out so much.-we watched "dear john" last night. i didn't cry. i weaped. oh mamma.)


ing to get my car tire changed today.

ing grocery shopping tonight.
(looking foward to buying some lovely summer fruit.)



d is good.

Woman.

Women in the Bible take my breath away..

The last couple of months, I've been reading about Tamar, in the book "Lineage of Grace."

& a couple of days ago, i rediscovered it in my draw.

Her story encourages me to be a women who will always trust in her God:

This young courageous Canaanite women had absolutely no idea what God had in store for her.

She didn't even know God..

She was brought up knowing of her family's gods.

Until she was brought to the house of Judah.

Dis-honour, sin, & tongues as sharp as sword surrounded his household.

Er married Tamar.

He died.

Onan married Tamar.

He died.

This is where i had read up to until i lost my book...

Watched "Joseph- King of Dreams" today.

Can't believe i haven't ever seen that movie before?

I discovered & learnt so much i never knew about him?

I knew he Judah was Joseph's brother, but it really shook me up realising how Judah must of been feeling, & the sin that he carried bared by the abandonment of his brother.

After seeing this movie, consumed with curiosity, i had to finish this book!

Found out today,

She disgused herself as a prostitute after finding out Judah's wife had died.

& he was coming to the Canaanite temple to sleep with other women!

She fell pregnant with his child!

Judah finds out & commands to burn her!

Beaten.

While her nurse ran to Judah's house & gave him his staff he gave to this "prostitute."

& she didn't even shame him in front of everyone about his sin!

she just waited for her God to intervene.

-meanwhile she was being killed for his sin!

oh my gosh, i was freaking out reading the end of her story..

He fit the whole puzzle together & ran to her Fathers house before they killed her.

Stopped the whole thing.

Ended up bearing to healthy twin boys!

- who ended up being part of the lineage of Jesus!

Judah respected and admired her for the rest of his life for what she did for his house.

When he had bought her home to his son Er, he'd never realized how God would use her to bring him to repentance, to change his heart, to change the direction of his life.

Tamar was a women of excellence, a women worthy of praise.

Her story has effected me & will continue to effect the hearts of

every generation to come.

Gentle.

Quality time, with some quality people always makes a good end to a perfect summers day.
Yesterday was one of the most beautiful days of the year.
Not too hot, not too warm.
& considering it was Sunday, make it even better!

In the morning, we arrived in the Kapiti Coast early.
Left early with Dave Morris & Cam Warn.
I knew as soon as i got in the car, i would not be listening to John Meyer, or classical music.
I admitted the other day, that i might, potentially, maybe, be warming up to- i don't even know what it's called.. screaming music?
- it's defiantly not what i would usually listen to.. & i'm still not 100% convinced i like it..
but.
i dunno. lol.
there is something about it, that's so undignified.
there is different layers to each song.
& even though i can't hear much of a melody, there is something captivating about it..
we'll see..


Dynamite was seriously crazy.
After 4 weeks of spending most days with them,
-finally Tracey & Nicole recognise me at Church.
that made me feel special.


After Church, the classic Mollie, Ange & Bek jumped in the car & headed off to Waitangi Park.
Threw a banana at Tim Ng's car.
De-toured to the supermarket.
& lay of the grass.
the sky was a wonderful mixture of light & dark blue, mixed with lavender & peach all blending into one another.
imagine if sunsets had scents along with it's colours.

Bek once again confronted me of my spelling.

"by the way man, it's 'golden', not 'goldern'- there is no R."

now this is engraved in my memory i am improving.
spelling 'potenially' (potentially-thanks spell check) is still my weakness.
-it looks the same to me, so i don't see what the big problem is.
i remember when i was little- at Kiburnie children's pool area.
my dad taught me how to spell 'because'.. the longest word i knew.
now every time i spell 'because'- i sing the song that he sang for me to remember.

Same with the word 'purple'.
at my Mum's old work, Kelburn Medical Centre.
So now every time i drive through Kelburn, i get the word purple stuck in my head.

I enjoy how different places spark different memories.




Today, I thought was once another sunny day.
then i opened my blinds..
& to my surprise, it was overcast?
then i fell back to sleep, & woke up to a clear blue sky.



it keeps reminding me about going for swims in the warm sea water.

usually i really don't like going swimming.

i love water more than anything.

it's personal to me though.

but this summer, i want to explore different beaches, & gentle lakes.
spontaneous road trip to lake Taupo?

i think so.

relaxing-has been the key word for today..
stayed in my room the whole day, & only appearing to make an omelet, & get some canned beetroot along with golden kiwifruit.

this week, i've just wanting to listen to the Pocahontas soundtrack.
-stumbled upon the full movie of "Beauty & the Beast" movie on You Tube today.
My favourite Disney Movie.
I like the fact, she had no idea who he was. She was forced to live in his household. he was consumed by pride, & anger which didn't make him a pleasure to be around.
but by her femininity & patience, she softened his heart.

"a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."

-Proberbs 15:1

"through patience a ruler can be persauded, & a gentle tounge can break a bone."

-Proverbs 25:14

Spend.

Lately spending a lot of time by myself.

It's very very nice.

I used to be a little bit of an introvert.

I would try go off by myself all the time.

But now, I just want to talk & spend time with people all the time.

Thinking of the people in my life that i am thankful for,

& imagining what it would be like to live life without them.

it's something i really can't imagine.

Having them entwined in your life, & then all of a sudden having them pack up & leave for good.

it makes me feel uncomfortable.

i need to learn instead of feeling stable with a consistent life routine or a week involving certain people- I want to find every dominant comfort in my heavenly Dad.

& my Dad rang yesterday!

It was seriously so good to hear him.

He went fishing with my uncle.

craving even more to be on the water in a boat now.


I spent some time in the perfume section the other day at Farmers.

I enjoy perfume.

Vera Wang

Flower bomb

and Daisy

but these have to be my all time favourites!

lol, & you probably don't even care..

they all are similar in category-sweet floral but light.
but all so different.

something that has kind of been stirring in my heart at the moment, is the woman who poured perfume over Jesus' feet.

..she was completely & utterly undignified.

i'm going to be a women who would be so overwhelmed & effected by God, that i would get that undignified like that.

The radio is someone I have been spending some time with.

-getting caught up in music has been a regular occurrence.

i just want to belt out at the top of my lungs, words, and songs, and not care about whether you hit every key, or sound great.

For some reason, I was just so excited last night.

I couldn't even settle down at life group, so while i was trying to ask everyone what they thought of the message & how it spoke to them, i was slurring my words & kept finding myself wandering off into random things that i loved about God.

they probably thought i was loopy..

just wanted to skip.

& i did!

When God takes hold of your heart, you can't help but get excited!

By the way, i spend my last day at school last week.

School has finished.

This subject of conversation has been avoided for some time now.

scared, yes.

But I know what God has in store is greater than what i could possibly imagine.

I don't want a time machine..I kind of like not knowing.

I secretly want to be back at kinder garden again.

eating play dough & sliced fruit all day.

Thursday was a wonderful day!

- Eat lunch outside on the balcony.

Yogurt, lasagna, crackers, & bread makes for 2 happy toddlers.

I also like driving around Tawa finding flowers.

It means more to me than just buying flowers for people.

You actually taking time, to actually find something special.

There is this lavender that lives down the road from me, & most weeks i enjoy going down & getting some for my room.

ps: not going into people's properties.

my dog Thor has literally been
sitting outside my room just
looking at me for about an hour.

he usually does it nights though.

i enjoy him.

& defiantly i have favouritism with
my animals.



















Lost count on how many days it's been sunny in a row.

& that's a beautiful thought.

Place.

The last couple of days I have been thinking of my favourite places to be in the world: when i was a child, & still to this day.

I have come to a conclusion

Top 10 favourite places to be:

1. Church.

- This is always going to be top of the list!

Where else would you rather be?

"Better is one day in your courts, than a thousand else where!"
-Psalm 81:10

That took me while to actually sink in & make it true for myself. All these other places I'm about to open up to you are beautiful in their way, & so so special to me.
But honestly, being with God, wouldn't even come close to anything else!

2. Kapiti Coast

- At first, this place was an inconvenience to me only because of where I lived. Then i completely fell in love with everything that it contains.

3. Lyndale Farm

- Childhood memories of me & my dad driving up, what felt like 3 hours for a 7 year old, was a place of joy. fejoia ice cream & after my attempt to feed a duck has brought upon a fear of this animal ever since.

4. Staglands Farm

- Farms have always scooped me up in it's landscape.

The peacocks that chased you, the white bird that said hello, & the giant rainbow trout where all part of the experience.

5. Sayers Hutt

- Tramping 3 hours up & down hill to get to this little location in the middle of no where, is more than worth it.

The smell of smoked fire wood will always be a comfort to me.

The best part is it lingers on your clothes, hair & skin for the next couple of day, almost to remind you to come back.

6. My room.

- I place of my own.

7. My Auntie's home.

- Her house is in Masterton, and is hands down the most beautiful house I have ever laid eyes on.

The first thing you do is enter through a red wooden gate.

is a mixture of grass patches & flowers that are randomly placed.

& hanging from the most dominate tree is a rope swing.

a stream that runs through the middle of her garden calls for the necessity of a car width bridge to get from one side to the other.

One of the highlights of Christmas day would be getting some line & a hook with a piece of bread or sausage meat attacted, & fishing for the biggest eel we would find.

Geese & ducks glide through from time to time.

When you get to the door step there are worn seats will quilts covering them.

The kitchen has a huge fireplace taking up most of the room.

the window looks out over their vegetable garden & chicken coop.

& a weaved hammock accompanies a tree.

the garage is still filled with my cousin's crashed car.

His room has a little secret hidden door which hides away the computer room.

In the corner there are unused drums.

One of the things I love most, are the randomly placed, and wonkey photo frames around the house. filled with my cousins childhood drawings.

...you can probably tell, i do enjoy this place dearly. ha ha.

8. My Grandma's house.

- She lives in Waikanai.

Nanna central, which i find lovely.

Her house is not short or shy of a floral pattern or little clay statue my grandad makes in his garage. Her house always smells of fresh home made bread. & her favourite thing to eat is microwaved pringles with cheese.

i enjoy her very much.

Her garden is filled with scents of all sorts of roses, and a full bloom magnolia tree appears in spring.

9. My Mum's bed in the afternoon.

- The sun accompanies my room in the morning, but in the afternoon, there is a little patch on her bed that i like to curl up on my days off and have a nap.

10. My Dad's old house.

- He used to live in Brooklyn, in a little old white house with a huge back yard which he used to get his sling shot & hit his empty beer cans he used to set up in a log from his balcony.

That makes my dad sound so hill billy. But my dad is someone who thought up many games like that ha ha.

He had 3 english bull terrier's: (not all at the same time.)

-Gringo

-Slug Boy

-& Horse

they all looked like they would kill you, but really the were huge teddy bears who would sit right on top of you just go get a cuddle.

My Dad is an incredible cook.

we always used to make roti & butter chicken together in his little kitchen.

the classic thing he would always make would be vogels bread with a little vegemite & grilled cheese.

In the corner of his dining room he had one of those underwater lizards- not sure what they are called, but it was white & called Gizmo.

I remember sitting on this knee one time at the dinner table & he was trying to figure out how to plate my hair once i asked him if he would do it for me.

i can't remember how it ended out- but most likely in fail.

I enjoy my Dad!- he makes me laugh

The End.

Embrace.

Embracing what you like can be an easy thing.

...but when your embracing something your not used to, or un-comfortable with, is so much more difficult.

Jesus is taking me somewhere I haven't really been before.

it's new, & exciting!

I wish, i could get a telescope.

& look ahead a couple of years

from now..but then again,

what kind of surprise would

that be right?

It's been making me think lately- when i get Tracey & Nicole out of the bath.

I put the towel out in front of them

they snuggle into it

& jump into my arms

..even though they aren't completely dry, and i get soaked all down my front.

i do not think for one moment that i should have rewind & wait for them to dry off to have cuddles.

because in that beautiful beautiful moment, we are both giggling out of the excitement of bath time!

& i guess that's kind of how i see God sometimes.

-when He embraces me after i muck up, or have a bad day.- i'm soaked in frustration, & i'm grumpy..

There are countess stories in the Bible about men, tending to his sheep.

sheep are smelly.

-& just thinking to myself, it wouldn't be that nice to hug a smelly sheep.

with the oil, and dirt rubbing off on you.

but these men in the Bible still did.

Something that has been personally stirring in my own heart at the moment, is that God is an un-conditional God.

You know those infomercials..

- i literally need to avoid them, as every time i watch one,

i get completly conned & convinced into what they are selling.

I need a magic bullet.

no.

I need Jesus.

& in the fine print, they trick you!

sneaky sneaky.

& there are all these terms & conditions to their product.

God doesn't have fine print attached to His name.

amen!

by the way..i found out- i hate bowling.

but secretly not. i love it..

i just do not like losing.

apparently only 12 year olds can have the gutters up.

guttered... ha ha.

2nd round: Bek challenged me to a one on one match.
i don't think i have ever failed in any other game as much as i did that night.

driving home on a Saturday night with
two friends i wouldn't want to live without.
putting our heads out the window with the
surprisingly warm air rushing past & taking
over our hair.. i enjoy when you feel out the
window, & air, for one moment- feels tangible
...but it couldn't be far from the truth.

i like my friends..

Home.

it's basically summer, but i'm already looking forward for next years spring.
is that sad?

Good afternoon!

Today, is over cast is Karori.

- yet, I am thankful.

Everyday is a 10 hour day.

This season is making me even more joyful to come home.

I enjoy my family.

I like the radio too.
Every morning i bring my pillow & blanket into the car.

Turn on classic hits, put the seat back,- and sleep.

Maybe I wouldn't be so tired if I went to sleep earlier?

potentially.

But to be honest, i like the night, and staying up late!

Lately, for some strange reason,

I always feel like sailing on a boat.

I enjoyed going on my Grandad's boat every summer.

Maybe sometime soon?

-yes please!
As strange as it sounds, the smell of oil & petrol of the boat will always be a comfort smell to me.

We used to go to this beach, with golden sand. if you dug a hand depth into the sand, you were bond to find a hu hu grub buried underneath.

I believed the person who said they tasted like peanut butter- but they taste like wood?

i was secretly disappointed.

Driving through Brooklyn most days, has made me relise i would like a house that's painted multi colours.

Not exactly rainbow.

But different colours would be exciting!
Just a passing thought.

Last night, worked late, & was considering going to the hangout at James Duxfield.

but Burke & Bakes had another idea!

spontaneous arrival were the key words of the night.

Finally the hot water has come back on at my Nanna's apartment.

They are currently away on holiday in Australia, so popping in most days has now become a routine. Even though there is no food or drink besides soda water in the house.
i still enjoy it!

Properly been thinking less about things now.

God is teaching me how to be carefree & not stress about things that i'm not meant to have cluttered in my head.

So, so, so often you always hear, "trust God."

But putting it into practice is a whole lot harder!

...driving down Niranga Gorge (takes hands of steering wheel & yells)-"Jesus take the wheeell."
...maybe not.

ha ha, but close to it!

Whats in His hand is even greater than i could possibly imagine.

to what is going to happen next God!

(excitedly smiles)

I enjoy the idea of being in water, & being completely surrounded.

Clothed.

"She is clothed in dignity & strength, she laughs at the days to come." Proverbs 31:25

..................................................................................

Nanny, is one word that has become part of my regular vocabulary now.

it's more rewarding than i could have possibly imagined.

God has given me a whole new revelation about being child-like.

Have you ever realised how forgetful kids are?

How carefree too!

i'm starting to sound really corny now, but i actually find it beautiful.

Had the afternoon off today.
-came back home, and realised from the other day being locked IN the house, that i still did not have a key on my key chain.

• Visited Mum.
• Visited School.
• Visited Photobooth.

-lets just stay at school for an hour or so.

I enjoy photo booth way too much...

Went back to work.

Found some "spicy seafood" asian noodles in the cupboard tonight.

Do you remember those prawn crackers you get from the dairy?
Soup+noodle version of them.
Why would anyone create these?

Tini came home with some new kids furniture.

spent the next hour on the ground laughing at how clueless & un-experianced we were to put a set of chairs, table, and book case together.

i think i enjoy my puffer jacket a lot.

Mum came into my room earlier & gave me some hair product.

-i honestly cannot stop smelling it.

It smells like rasberries.

i can hear peter snoring in the other room.

i actually find snoring really relaxing.
(smiles.)

I am really enjoying life.

Eat.

kind words are like honey;
good for the soul & healing to the bones
proverbs 16:24





Today, the sun is out.
& now that i am already talking about the sun, I can tell you how excited I am for summer
I will welcome you with open arms my friend!


Aswell as seing all the Christmas decorations at the supermarket & shopping malls makes me sort of giddy!-don't judge me.
In my opinion it's never to early for Christmas.


favourite food at the moment has been:










-i've become best friends with goldern kiwifruit.
dried dates
fish
pears
banana on toast
honey sandwiches
feijoa tea

& mandarin h2go water











Mum is going through a new fase.
cooking new food.
instead of me making my own seperate meal & mum making the classic steer family household spagetti bolonaise mince mixture to feed us for a solid season- she has been branching out now that she has a new cook book.
she is very cute.
she bought a new appron & everything!
-and will make any excuse to wear it around the house.
i enjoy her very much.

& something else she got:
This was a long time ago- (about a month ago)
I came downstairs, & found a soda stream on the counter top!
My dreams had come true.
Since then, my fluid intake has consisted of soda water.


ps: i got a job!
-hello Jesus providing.
& it's the most wonderful job i could possibly imagine.
Nannying for the two most full of life childern i have ever met.


The other day while i was eating an orange, and you know when you hold up a piece of orange peal to your face and squeeze it in half, the juice out of the skin spits out?
Did it to Tracey.
Now everytime I eat an orange, Tracey asks me to have sparkles on her cheek.





Nannying is also
teaching me how
to think of fun ways
to eat food!





I really do think life is good
(smiles big goofy grin.)